When the weekend arrives I welcome the opportunity to meet with friends and sample East African cuisine. In many ways this experience can easily be paralleled to dining in the UK, yet at the same time they sit worlds apart… probably because they are worlds apart!
See this as a step-by-step guide to eating out in Kenya; this information could be extremely valuable as you may end up in a Kenyan restaurant when you least expect it.
Time. Like most things in Africa, eating must be given the upmost respect concerning time. Hence, if you plan to eat out in Kisumu, I would recommend ordering roughly two days in advance to avoid any unnecessary waiting. Otherwise you could be waiting a while! The indefinite continued progress of existence aka time; isn’t a huge issue to most here as proceedings tend to happen eventually. Be smart – order early.
Cold. When you order a drink, always, always remember to ask for it to be delivered ‘cold’ (that’s baridi in Kiswahili). Otherwise you will end up with the inevitable look warm, I’d-rather-dehydrate, bottle of Coca-Cola or beer. And who would want that?! But seriously, why is there even the option of taking these drinks warm. I will never know.
Tap Water. Do not even go there if you value life in any shape or form.
The Bill. If I could make up a proverb, it would probably be: “A wise man always cross-references the bill with the menu.” I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve been ‘done in’. It’s almost like a game and your role is to catch-out the restaurant. When you do, everyone laughs (like the end of an episode of Thunderbirds), then you pay the actual price. Easy.
Enjoy your meal. Love you Kenya.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Obama's Head keeps me dry...
Allow me to introduce you to the rainy season. Generally between April and June, Kenya experiences torrential rain fall, on a daily basis! For the local farmers who are desperate to grow profitable crops, the formation of dark clouds will bring tears of happiness to their eyes. For everyone else, life becomes nothing short of a disaster! This country was not built to deal with heavy rain and hence hours of hammering rain on sheets of rusted tin tend to take its toll.
‘It’s the rainy season… it happens every year,’ one man informs me. ‘I didn’t think it rained in Africa,’ I would reply.
‘El niño is coming…’ another woman screams as she sprints past me with a plastic bag tied over her head. Is he a Politician…? I wonder to myself, whilst drawing out my Lonely Planet guidebook.
Driving becomes an art form when the rain arrives. The dust turns to mud and the public transport becomes unhealthily over-populated. The combination of mud and window condensation transforms the main road of Kisumu into the first stage of the annual Safari Rally. I believe my matutu completed the distance with one of the fastest times yesterday… One must become accustomed to the proverbial African rainy day. Surely not that difficult coming from N. Ireland!
Despite the inconveniences brought by hailstones the size of small golf balls, the Kenyans always seem to find the funny side. Water dripping onto a brand new laptop or the commute home being delayed by two hours can’t be anything but funny… can’t it?
When buying an umbrella this week with a head shot of Obama on top, the guy at the till exclaimed, ‘This is our President…’ Now that I think is funny! I quietly corrected him and was on my way to join the second stage of the Safari Rally.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
So good they named it twice…
Kenya boasts a vast range of public transport options. This spans, in my humble opinion, from the unsafe to the very unsafe, yet in a strange way it makes travel exciting! You couldn’t write some of the things they come up with here. Many of the common modes of transport find themselves with double-barreled, onomatopoeic titles. For example, the Tuk-Tuk, which can only be described as a three wheeled motorbike with a hood. They say it’s called a Tuk-Tuk due to the machine-gun like sound it makes… tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk… that is comically rather accurate (and noisy).
The double-barreled titles continue with the bicycle which is addressed in kiswahili as the Boda-Boda and the kind of travel most associated with the village. The Boda-Boda, for me, is easily the most dangerous way to travel around town, especially as other drivers do not refrain from nudging the rear wheel if it happens to be impeding their journey! As well as holding little or no respect on the road, the Boda-Boda is slow and often more expensive!
This leads me to the motorbike and my dream of one day learning to ride one. Affectionately known as the Piki-Piki in East Africa, the motorbike is a must have commodity. In Kisumu, at least, I give this mode of transport top marks for its availability (at any time of the day) and general cost effectiveness (not forgetting the coolness factor). However, it’s the thrill of being whisked off through the dusty suburbs of Sub-Saharan Africa with the wind blowing in ones hair and the satisfaction of not having every inch of personal space invaded, much like on the matatu!
After seven months of testing the exciting modes of transportation, I thank God he has answered prayers and watched over my safety! He is faithful – that’s for sure!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
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